


The Guide Book on How Not to Come Out

by AndiMackFiction



Category: Jamie Johnson
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24807766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndiMackFiction/pseuds/AndiMackFiction
Summary: Dillon has just come out to Elliot. But the ramifications of it are gonna be big, as you might guess from the title.
Relationships: Alba/Liam, Dillon/Elliot
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

Dillon looked at his phone. A message from Elliot. He wanted to talk. Dillon had butterflies in his stomach. He was extremely excited, but also really nervous. Dillon had never come out to anyone before. He had wanted to. Ruby was his best friend, he had been hoping to tell Ruby after he found out Elliot was gay, but things didn't go according to plan. But if Dillon's dad, Frank found out he was hanging out with Elliot, then...

Dillon wasn't ready for his dad to find out he was gay. He had to come up with an excuse.

"Dad, I'm going to go get some extra practice for Foxborough."

Dillon's dad was OK with it. Dillon went up to get ready and left the house. Unfortunately, after he did, Frank started on Liam.

"You could learn a thing or 2 from your brother."

It made Liam so angry. Their dad was always comparing the two brothers and ever since Liam got kicked out of Phoenix last year, it had gotten even worse. Sometimes Liam thought that their dad didn't even love them. Frank sighed,  
"Listen, why don't you go catch up with your brother. Maybe he can teach you how to be a decent football player." Liam didn't move. "Well?!" Frank's voice was raised. This wasn't an offer, this was an order.

Liam reluctantly dragged his feet out of the door. He didn't look back. He couldn't let his dad see any sadness. Any pain. Any hurt. Any **weakness**.

When Liam finally arrived at Phoenix to train, he spotted Dillon. But weirdly, Dillon wasn't training. Liam took his time getting here, but not enough that Dillon wouldn't still be training. He was with that new kid living with Alba. Elliot if he remembered correctly. Oh, this was good. If Frank saw this, then Liam would for sure be the favourite. Liam took out his phone and took a picture. Now he had a reason to be excited. When he walked back home, he had a stride in his step.

***

Meanwhile, Dillon and Elliot were talking.  
"So," started Elliot.  
"So," said Dillon.  
"Am I the first person you've come out to?"  
"Yeah. I... It's OK coming out to you, but I'm not ready to tell anyone else."  
"I get it. I won't tell anyone, but you don't have to hide who you are."  
"It's easy for you to say!" Dillon raised his voice. "You don't **have** to hide who you are. You don't have a homophobic dad who..." Dillon looked down. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get mad. I'm just scared. We may fight a lot, but I still love my dad. I even love Liam. I don't want to lose them."  
"I get it. My mum took her time to come round, but she was never homophobic. I'll never know what it's like to be in your position."  
"I was hoping for something more than that."  
"I know I'm like your "gay guru" or whatever, but I don't know everything." Dillon slumped at that.  
"Oh."  
"But that doesn't mean I'm not gonna be here for you, and talk to you, and punch anyone who gives you grief for being gay." Dillon started tearing up. Elliot looked at him with sympathy for a moment, and then hugged him. "Everything's gonna be OK Dillon. You're going to be fine." Dillon buried his chest on Elliot's shoulder. He didn't have the strength to lift it. He just wanted to stay like this forever. After what felt like hours, Elliot lifted Dillon's head up. But Dillon still felt weak at the knees. Everything was just so unbelievable. Dillon started to drop, but Elliot made sure he didn't. Elliot laughed, and Dillon looked at him annoyed before laughing too. "Come on, let's sit down." Elliot helped Dillon hobble to a nearby bench.

"It's so weird," said Dillon. "Why can't I stand straight? Why do I feel so weak?"  
"You're nervous. I was like that the first time I came out to someone. It's like, you're finally free and you don't have to hide from the entire world, and you just want to relax and not have to struggle anymore. And you just want to be there and do nothing. Is that how it's like for you?"  
"Yeah. It still feels unreal. Like I'm dreaming and don't want to wake up."  
"I still get that sometimes. Every time I come out, it's still a rush to me."  
"But you're so confident."  
"I wasn't always. It took a lot of time for me to work up the courage to come out for the first time, and even now, when I see how people are treated... It's hard. But I promised to always stay true to myself."  
"That's amazing. You're... Amazing. I... I..."  
"Dillon, if you're about to say what I think you are..."  
"That I like you? That's ridiculous!" Elliot squeezed Dillon's arm.  
"It's OK if you do. You don't have to pretend to be someone else around me. You don't have to retreat again and put up your shields."

Dillon took in a deep breath. Then he let it out.  
"Elliot, ever since I met you, I've had a huge crush on you. You're nice, and sweet and different, and everytime I talk to you, I get butterflies in my stomach, and -" Elliot was closing his eyes. "You don't feel the same way, do you?"  
"It's not that. I just got out of a relationship. I'm not ready for a new one. And once my mum gets out of hospital, and I move away..."  
"Then why'd you tell me to tell you?"  
"Maybe I didn't think your crush was as big as it was. Maybe I thought you deserved to know. Maybe some part of me does like you. Does think you're cool, does think that you're so strong for having to live with a homophobic dad. Ruby told me how much you changed, and I think it's amazing. But I'm not ready."  
"Screw you! I opened up to you, and you're probably gonna just laugh about it, aren't you? You and Ruby, you'll have a right old laugh. Pathetic Dillon! I can't believe I thought I had a chance with you. I can't believe I thought I could trust you! I'm never gonna be able to come out, I'm never gonna be free, I'm never gonna find love! I hate you Elliot!" Dillon ran off. Back home. Elliot started running after him, shouting for him.  
"Dillon! Wait! Please!" But Dillon was too fast. Elliot lost track of Dillon after about a minute, and he didn't know where Dillon lived. Elliot wanted to cry, but he couldn't. He had to focus. No matter how much Elliot was hurting, Dillon must be feeling even worse. He had to find Dillon. OK, Dillon loves Phoenix. Maybe he went there. Elliot wasn't the most athletic, but he ran to Phoenix. He couldn't let Dillon hurt any longer than he had to.

***

Dillon was just outside his front door. Before he opened it, he turned his back toe the door and wiped the tears from his eyes. He couldn't let his dad see him like this. After he was finally able to stop the tears, he turned round and opened the door. And then he went inside the kitchen. But Frank was there waiting for him. He held up Liam's phone, showing the picture Liam took of him and Elliot. Dillon glared at Liam, but Liam just grinned and shrugged. Frank gave the phone back to Liam. Finally, Frank spoke and Dillon felt like his heart had stopped,  
"You haven't been going training, have you?" Dillon let himself cry again. Maybe his dad would think that it was about the training,  
"I'm sorry dad, it's just -"  
"And this boy. Liam told me that those freaks pretending to be married have taken him in. And I know **exactly** who he is." Liam looked confused at this. Frank stepped right in front of Dillon, towering above him. "You see, the other parents have been talking. About the gay kid that's here on "emergency placement". What a load of crap. He can't live by himself for a few days? So he's a coward and a loser then. Just like every other gay person. Just like -"

Once Frank said that Elliot was gay, the gears started turning in his head. What did Elliot being gay have to do with anything? Dillon was just hanging out with him. Why was that a problem? The past year... Liam wasn't perfect now, but he understood that there was nothing wrong with being gay. And then it all clicked into place in his head. And he realised how badly he had screwed the pooch. But now wasn't the time for that. Liam had to be strong for Dillon.

Liam stepped to the side of Frank and yelled,  
"Dad, stop! It was a trick! I was mad that Dillon was getting all the attention and I told him Elliot wanted to train with him. Dillon thought he was going to train, but it was all to get the picture and make me the favourite. Neither of us knew Elliot was gay, or else he wouldn't have hung out with that freak, right Dillon?" Dillon stayed silent for a bit.  
"Well, son?" asked Frank. Liam looked at Dillon and silently mouthed to him 'Please'.  
"Yeah," said Dillon. "Yeah, I would never have hung out with him if I had known." Liam breathed a sigh of relief.  
"Good. Good, that's my boy. Now as for **you** -" Frank turned to face Liam. His voice was raised. "How dare you? Competing with your brother? That's fine. As long as no one sees, you can do what you want. But making me think your brother is just like those other freaks? That's unforgivable."

Frank turned to Liam. And raised his arm. He was about to slap Liam. And Frank was strong. Liam and Dillon had both seen their dad get into fights before. And Liam was afraid. His dad had never hit him before. He was so afraid he couldn't move. He couldn't run away. He just stood there, and he was about to be hit. Time seemed to slow down and -

"Dad, I'm gay." Frank lowered his arm and turned to face Dillon. Liam, finally free of his fear, collapsed to the floor. Then he went up to Dillon and put his arm around his shoulder in solidarity. Dillon smiled at him and did the same. Liam and Dillon had their differences but they were still brothers, and Liam felt protected by Dillon. Dillon continued,  
"Liam was lying now to protect me, but that's all it was. A lie. He probably thought I was straight and didn't want you to get the wrong idea." But to that, Liam puffed his chest out and said proudly,  
"Nah bro. I figured it out. I wanted to protect you." Dillon lightly slapped Liam on the head so it wouldn't hurt as if to say "Shut up, I'm trying to protect you". Frank pushed Liam away,  
"I'll deal with you later, Liam." Frank smiled at Dillon: A cruel smile. "A slap isn't enough for you though, Dillon. Let me get my belt." Dillon's eyes widened.

Once Frank left the room, Liam hugged Dillon.  
"He's never hit us before, Dillon. You don't think he's really going to... Do you?" Dillon closed his eyes but said nothing. Once he opened his eyes, he said,  
"Go. I don't want you to see this if... I'll be fine, but if not..." Liam nodded, and left as Frank re-entered the room.

And then Liam heard Dillon scream in pain. And Liam couldn't do anything. It was Liam's fault and he couldn't do anything. He was frozen in place again. He was so afraid. No, he could do one thing. With shaky hands, Liam took his phone out of his pocket and dialled the number for Phoenix.

***

When Mike and Duncan arrived, Liam opened the door for them. He looked terrified. Mike asked Liam to take them to Dillon and they found him lying in the kitchen. His arm was bruised and had blood on it. Liam looked away and wanted to throw up. Mike stood in front of Liam so he wouldn't have to see anything. Mike and Duncan called for an ambulance so that Dillon could be taken to hospital. They stayed by Dillon's side until the ambulance arrived.

***

Most of Phoenix had heard about what happened with Dillon. They didn't know he was gay of course. Once Dillon was well enough to speak, Duncan questioned him about what had happened though, and Dillon wasn't ready to tell him, but when Mike asked him, he decided to trust Mike and tell him why his dad had beat him. Mike had called the police and it looked like Frank was going to get his comeuppence, especially since in the days following the incident, Dillon's mum served divorce papers on Frank.

***

It had been a week since the incident. Mike had asked Dillon if he was OK to see visitors other than Mike, Duncan, Liam and his mum, and Dillon had agreed, so the whole of Phoenix was inside the waiting room of the hospital, including Jamie, Jack add the under 13s. Liam came out of Dillon's hospital room with a small smile on his face. It seemed Dillon was doing well at least. Jamie asked to go see Dillon next and Mike let him go ahead. Duncan then called Liam over to speak to him and Mike privately.

"Well, son," Duncan said to Liam. "I think it's safe to say your probationary period is over. You did a heroic thing. If you hadn't called us, your brother might still be living inside a homophobic household." Liam raised his eyebrow in curiosity. "Dillon told Mike, and he gave Mike permission to tell me. Point is, you should be proud of yourself. We talked it over and we'd be glad to have you on the team. No more probation." Liam leaned against the wall shaking his head, tears in his eyes,  
"No, I shouldn't be proud. If I hadn't screwed up, Dillon wouldn't be in hospital. I was mad at... At... You know. He was always comparing me to Dillon, making me so jealous, so I wanted to get revenge. When I saw Dillon bunking training, I took a picture. I... Didn't know... I didn't think that... But **he** figured it out. And I couldn't do anything to stop it. If I wasn't jealous, Dillon never would've been in hospital. It's all my fault. I'm sorry, Dunc. I can't come back. You were right about me all along. I never changed." Liam ran off and went to sit on his own.

Duncan looked sadly at Liam, and then back at Mike,  
"I knew we should have never let him back in the club. Look what he's done!"  
"He didn't do it on purpose. He never meant for **this** to happen."  
"How do you know, Mike? How do you know he didn't just tell their dad on Dillon just so he could play the hero?" Mike shook his head.  
"He's a kid, Duncan. Not an evil mastermind. Only one person at Phoenix could fit that description." Mike started walking away from Duncan. Duncan followed him,  
"You still haven't forgiven me." Mike looked around.  
"Let's not do this in front of the kids. Outside." Mike continued walking towards the hospital exit and Duncan followed him.

Outside, Mike sat on a bench. He gestured for Duncan to sit down. Mike sighed,  
"Of course I haven't forgiven you... What you did, it's..."  
"I made a mistake. I've been trying to make up for it ever since."  
"Tell me, then, Duncan. How long were you telling Hawkstone that Jamie wanted to stay with you?" Duncan said nothing.  
"You want us to be honest with each other? Then be honest." Mike started getting up.  
"1 year." Mike sat back down.  
"1 month of kindness does not make up for a year of cruelty."  
"Now, that's not fair. I wasn't being crueled. He loved it here at Phoenix."  
"Now there's your problem, Duncan. This is why I can't forgive you. You don't understand that what you did was wrong."  
"I do, I just..."  
"Are you sorry you ruined Jamie's future or sorry you got caught?" Now Duncan raised his voice slightly,

"That's not fair Mike. I wasn't responsible for Jamie's accident, it was his deadbeat father." This time it was Mike's turn to raise his voice,  
"My granson is miserable. He's got no motivation, no hope, no nothing, and maybe it's not on you. Maybe it's not, but every time I think about that day, I think that if just one thing had gone differently, Jamie would still be able to play football. And there were so many things, but only one whose actions were malicious."  
"How **dare** you blame me for Jamie's accident. Mike sighed again,  
"I don't. Not really. But it's hard for me to forgive you. Not while Jamie's feeling like this. I'm mad at everyone, including myself. I can't forgive myself either. Maybe one day, I'll forgive you for everything. But that won't be for a while."  
"Right. Does this mean you're leaving Phoenix?"  
"I hate you, Duncan. But I care about these kids. I'm not going to leave." Duncan nodded his head,  
"Do you think Liam really felt guilty?"  
"Yeah. He was back on the squad. He had no reason to tell us that he thought he was responsible for what happened. We need to talk to him, Duncan. We need to make sure he's OK."  
"Do you mind if I'm the one who talks to him? Can you trust me?"  
"I trust you to do what's right by these kids... When it doesn't hurt you." Duncan nodded sadly. "Go talk to him, Duncan. You have more in common with him than I do." Duncan said nothing, just nodded and went back to the hospital. Mike waited, then went back inside too."

***

While Mike and Duncan were having their conversation, Liam had a conversation of his own. He was sitting alone, but it was Eric who first sat next to Liam,  
"You done the right thing, man. But if anyone asks, I still hate you." Liam smiled about this, but only for a second. Then Alba sat on Liam's other side and Freddie next to Alba.  
"Dude, you're a hero!" said Freddie. Then, uncharacteristically quiet for Freddie, "You should be happy." Liam put his head into his arms.  
"I'm not a hero. It's cause of me Dillon got attacked by... Attacked in the first place." Alba motioned for Freddie and Eric to leave. Then she said,  
"Did you want him to get hurt?"  
"No."  
"Then you did the right thing."  
"I'm no hero."  
"No, you're not. But you're still a good person." Liam went in to hug Alba. Alba patted him on the shoulder. When they came out of the hug, Liam leaned in again, as if about to kiss Alba. Alba pushed him away. Freddie and Eric saw this from afar and burst into laughter.

"What do you think you're doing Liam?" asked Alba in shock.  
"I thought that's what you wanted," said Liam in surprise. They always do that in movies and stuff. Eric and Freddie came back, still laughing. Freddie patted Liam on the shoulder,  
"Nice try mate. Better luck next time." Alba glared at Freddie. "OK, OK, we can take a hint. Come on Eric." Eric and Freddie moved away, but made sure to stay close enough so that they could hear what was going on. After they were gone, Alba started again,  
"You know movies aren't the same as real life, right? In real life, you can't just kiss someone who you're not dating without asking them... Ruby told me that."  
"Well, then... Can I kiss you?"  
"No." Eric and Freddie were trying to control their laughter. "But you can ask me out on a date." Eric and Freddie looked at each other in surprise.  
"Can I... Would you... Um..."  
"You're terrible at this Liam."  
"I'm sorry, I've never asked anyone on a date before."  
"I could kind of tell."  
"Can't you ask me out instead?"  
"That would ruin the surprise of whether or not I say yes."  
"That's the problem."  
"Give it a try, eh?" Liam instead decided to grab a glass of water and gurgled the words into the glass,  
"Would you like to go out with me?" Alba laughed before saying,  
"Yeah, you dork. I'd love to go out on a date with you. Not now though. Ruby told me if someone's feeling vulnerable, you should wait for them to get back to their old self to say yes to a date with them. I never really got what she meant till now" Liam smiled and then Eric and Freddie smiled at each other, then went over to Liam and Alba. At that time, Duncan arrived and said,

"Liam, a word?"  
"I can't," replied Liam. "I quit the team, remember Dunc?"  
"Alba, Freddie, Eric."  
"Got it boss," said Freddie, giving him a salute before going on the opposite side of the waiting room with Eric and Alba.  
"Liam, if you really didn't mean for what happened to happen, you're not to blame."  
"But if it wasn't for me..." started Liam.  
"If it wasn't for you, Dillon may never have found the courage to come out. You messed up, but you tried to do the right thing, and that's what matters. The spot's still yours if you want it."  
"Can I think about it?"  
"Whenever you're ready."  
"Right. Thanks, Dunc. You're not as big a loser as I thought." Duncan glared at Liam. "Sorry, old habits and that. Hey, since you're all being nice to me and stuff, want to by me food? I'm starving and the food here is terrible." Duncan had to control his laugh. He should be annoyed but Liam was finally back to normal. Instead, he said nothing. "Right, I can take a hint. I'm going back to my loving girlfriend who is super lucky to have me and I didn't take more than one try to ask out. We have a date to plan. See ya, Duncs!" And then Liam went to find Alba, Eric and Freddie.

Mike sat next to Duncan.  
"He seems back to normal," said Mike.  
"Yeah," replied Duncan. "Yeah."  
"Keep on like that and maybe some day I'll be able to forgive you." Duncan smiled. The two continued a surprisingly pleasant chat.

***

After Jamie left Dillon's side, he went to look for Boggy. After seeing Dillon, Jamie realised how badly he messed up. Boggy was his best friend and he treated him like dirt. He saw Boggy talking with Jack.  
"Jack, could you give us a minute please?" said Jamie. Jack looked shocked. She would have thought Jamie wanted to spend more time with her, not Boggy, but she reluctantly nodded her head and left the two.  
"Boggy, I... I... I've been really stressed lately, and I've been down, and I know it's no excuse, but... and I understand if you can't forgive me, but I'm really really really sorry. I'll get you a hospital cracker if you want me to prove it."  
"Jamie..." started Boggy. "Of course I forgive you. I know how much you've been struggling. It's tough. It makes sense that you'd snap."  
"So... Friends again?" Boggy hesitated. "Boggy?"

"I can't be around you like this. I've got issues of my own you know. Not that you've ever even bothered to ask how I'm doing."  
"You're right. You're too good to be my friend Boggy." Boggy said nothing.  
"Once you've figured yourself out, and who you want to be, come find me again. Until then, I'm going home." Boggy started walking away, and then looked back. "Don't worry, I won't tell Jack about what happened. You should ask her out. She's staying for the Summer, and maybe she'll be able to bring your joy back when I can't. Goodbye, Jamie." And then Boggy left the hospital.

Jack came back, but Jamie didn't want to talk. He just wanted to go home, but he had to shake off Jack.  
"Hey, Jamie," started Jack. "I've got two tickets to the Hawkstone match tonight. Want to join me?"  
"Sorry, Jack. I've got to help my mum all day. I should probably get going now. See ya."  
"Wait! Jamie!" But Jamie was already off.

Boggy and Jamie both did the same thing when they got home: Sat on the floor of their room and cried.

***

The final person to see Dillon that day was Elliot. When Dillon saw Elliot, he closed his eyes. He couldn't face him after what he'd done. Elliot noticed this.  
"I'm not mad, Dillon." Dillon opened his eyes. "I'm used to your tantrums by now." Dillon grinned at this.  
"I wouldn't call them tantrums," said Dillon.  
"Hissy fits, drama queen, take your pick."  
"Tantrums it is."  
"I get it. Sometimes it feels like the world is out to get you. We're not. I'm not."  
"So you'll stay with us?" Elliot laughed,  
"I wish. My mum's out of hospital."  
"Oh, so this is a goodbye."  
"Actually, it's a hello. She and Becky and Dawn have agreed to let me stay the Summer and any other holidays if Becky and Dawn are Ok with it. So, it's alright. And, who knows, maybe by the end of the Summer, you'll have won me over. But until then, I shall always be your faithful Gay Guru, also known as your gayru. I've got 3 months to get over my ex after all." Elliot took a step back and bowed, causing Dillon to burst into a fit of giggles.

And the two stayed with each other till just 10 minutes before visiting hours were over. Chatting, laughing away. They only stopped because Liam wanted to see Dillon again before tomorrow. Things were gonna be OK.

=== End of Episode ===

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might continue doing some chapters in an episodic format, though at the moment, the only thing I know for sure if this continues is what will happen to Elliot at the end of it. I'm not too great at finishing my fan fics though, so for now, we'll leave this as a standalone. If I decide to have more chapters, sure. But not atm.
> 
> Mike and Duncan's fight was fun to write, and I hope it sheds a light on why Mike likes to bite Duncan's head off, right? But no, seriously, I loved having how different it was compared to Jamie and Boggy's fight in episode 7. While Jamie was super angry, Mike stayed calm.
> 
> Also, annoying-Liam only got 2 lines, but oh my god he's so much fun to write for. And yeah. Let me know what you guys think!


	2. Bonus Scene - The Guidebook on How Not to Write a Fanfiction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because I was in a rush to get this fanfiction out to (not-a-print), I completely forgot to include the Zoe Kat part of the chapter. Think of this as a bonus scene which should be read just before the final Dillon Elliot part.

Zoe had just got back from visiting Dillon in his room. It was horrible seeing him like this. The doctors had said that Dillon would recover pretty quickly, and he'd get to play football relatively, unlike Jamie. But to see someone do that to him. After how much Dillon had changed, how good of a person he had become, and his dad: How could he? It made Zoe feel sick to the stomach. But more than that, it made her feel dirty. Because how could she mad at someone else for hurting Dillon when she was doing the same to Kat. She let her anger get in the way of being a good person, and while Dillon had changed and stayed a good person, Zoe had heard Kat say something bad, and Zoe let her anger return. She returned to who she used to be. She thought she was a better person, but that wasn't true at all, was it?

She spent the next 10 minutes going back and forth in her head trying to decide whether or not she should tell Kat the truth. And in the end, Kat headed towards Dillon's room to see him. And Zoe was almost relieved but it was like her legs moved on their own, because while she was breathing a sigh of relief she suddenly found herself right next to Kat.

"Hey, Zoe!" she said. "It's been a while. It feels like you've been avoiding me since the cup final, but I know that's ridiculous, right?" Zoe wanted to say something, but no words would leave her mouth. "Right?" Zoe opened her mouth to speak. "You... You have been avoiding me." Zoe nodded. "Why?" Zoe reached into her pocket, for the pendant that had never left her side since she had found it. Kat and her were finally friends. Why did she have to ruin it. Zoe took out the pendant and showed it to Kat. "The pendant! You found it! Where did you find it? **When** did you find it?"

Zoe finally found her words,  
"In the girls' changing rooms. The day you lost it."  
"You've kept it. All this time. What? Were you planning to sell it?"  
"No, it's just..."  
"What? You wanted me to fail in front of the scout? What about the team?"  
"No! I've wanted to give it back to you for ages! But the day I found it, I heard you talking smack about me, and I just... I snapped."  
"So you turned to theft?! I thought we were friends!"  
"I was stupid, but we **are** friends. You have to believe me!"  
"No, we **were** friends. Not anymore." Kat started down the corridor, but turned back to say, "After I said what I said, Ruby told me how you were trying to look for my pendant. I thought I had gotten you wrong, but it turns out I was right. You can't let anyone else be happy except for yourself, can you?"  
"No, that's not it at all! I promise!"  
"I don't believe you."  
"Are you... Are you gonna tell Mike?" Kat didn't say anything. She turned her back to Zoe and kept walking. Zoe kept shouting for her, but she wouldn't answer.

Zoe went back to her seat. She sat alone. Her mind was racing. Zoe was a terrible person. She didn't deserve any friends. Kat was right to hate her. She even asked about her place on the team instead of Kat's feelings. Zoe wanted to go home, but she didn't have the strength. She pulled her knees onto the chair and rested her head on it. She was hoping that people would think she was asleep, and it appeared to the others that way, but Zoe was wide awake. And the entire time until visiting hours were over and the rest of Phoenix went, she sat there, hating herself.

And then, when the rest of Phoenix went, she followed suit, as if nothing had happened. As if Zoe was OK. But she wasn't.


End file.
